I seem to have misplaced my balls.

I apologize to my readers for having quoted lyrics from Roxette yesterday. However, it could have been worse, I could have quoted from It Must Have Been Love instead. What can I say, I was touching up some photos, iTunes was on random play, the photo, the song, my mood.... They all just came together and the post was the final result and that's that.


As per Arlo's advice, something from Mr. Coe

Country dj's knows that I'm an outlaw.
They'd never come to see me in this dive.
Where bikers stare at cowboys,
Who are laughin' at the hippies,
Who are prayin' they'll get out of here alive.
The loudmouth in the corners gettin' to me
Talkin' 'bout my earrings and my hair.
I guess he ain't read the signs that say I've been to prison,
But someone ought to warn him
Before I knock him off his chair.
'Cause my long hair just can't cover up my redneck.

The Road Goes on Forever

Breathe some faith into my chest
Lay me down, I need the rest
Ever since the sky turned grey
I've waited for the perfect day
***
There's no escape for the broken-hearted
There's no return once you've lost your way
***
Blinded by a crazy light
I fell into the darkest night
***
Bring back the perfect day

-Roxette, Perfect Day

When a good time turns around, you must whip it. You will never live it down, unless you whip it. -Devo

While hanging in the Library this past Halloween, (a bar on the LES with books, not a real library dumb ass) I noticed a rather large, 3' plus, finely crafted, riding crop on the ground. After trying it out on myself, I decided it would prove useful and stuck in my belt as if it was a pirate's cutlass. This thing was no simple Halloween prop, it's owner was into serious S&M. Well, a short time later that owner and her friends began looking on the ground for said riding crop. Like I said, it wasn't the sort of thing you left behind. Anyway, this was the end result of our brief encounter.

Note the guy in the Devo outfit in the background. Neat huh?

Hugs and Kisses,
-Sherb

"I felt like a monster reincarnation of Horatio Alger: A man on the move, and just sick enough to be totally confident." -HST

The best part of last night’s Halloween adventure with Arlo and the Asset? Aside from their wigs? Probably the offer that was made to me, “I’ll screw you.” While most would think this offer is rather inviting, let me tell you a couple things. First, the proposition was made by a man. Second, the screwing he was referring to would be the result of the yellow handled screwdriver in his waistband being plunged into my abdomen . . . repeatedly. Obviously, this handyman did not have the Halloween spirit. My only hope was that it be a philips and not a flat head screwdriver. I’d like to think the philips would make a cleaner entry, cause less damage to my internal organs.

Street punk, he wouldn’t have done shit, all bark. Woof, woof, woof. His two friends didn’t worry me either. Certainly the peacenik hippies with me would have been prepared to wield their peace medallions like ninja stars. Ummm. Maybe not? Regardless, a quick geographical survey and some basic logic told me that real screwdriver wielding thugs don’t hang out outside of egg-cream stands. Unphased, we continued up the street never turning around. That’s what I get for dressing up and acting like a real life Jackass. Come to think of it, I’ve gone out dressed like that on countless occasions and last night’s behavior was far from novel. Well, the whipping from the leather clad dominatrix was kinda new but that's for another entry.

Hugs and Kisses,
-Sherb